4 Original Song texts.

Song pastiche.
‘Collecting Cobwebs’.  The Nowhere Train. (For Adele):

There’s nothing wrong with a bleeding heart,
if the wound is being stitched.
But when your mind is limping
your soul is collecting cobwebs.
When your trademark wink
is more a twitch,
the rhymes are strained,
your tongue profane,
it’s time to get off the nowhere train.


Rosy  (Ro-Sy)
Written for Little Paul Venturi

Katy can’t do nothing of the things she can do.
She can kick your ass ‘n’ cut your liver in two.
Sally’s quite a critter but she’s worryin’ ’bout (bugs).
Megan’s quite a dancer but she don’t jump and shout.

Ya’ll witty girls stop your hangin’ around,
quit your witty ways ‘n’ I’ll quit singing so loud.
She can tell me straight away how life’ll work out.
So don’t you even ask me what I’m talkin’ about.
So don’t you even ask me what I’m talkin’ about.

She’s the only one
She’s the lonely one
She’s the boney one
She’s the stony one
macaroni one
saxophony one
she’s the only one I’m talkin’ about.

She’s a wowy woman. Sticks in my mind.
People of her kind  ain’t so easy to find

Ro – sy
Ro – sy


American Stew
Written for Little Paul Venturi

A 1
Mister Bunyan cut an onion, make it fine.
Dine dine dine on American stew.
Green tomatoes, sweet potatoes, needles of pine.
Dine dine dine on American stew.
Aunt Jemina. Mix ‘em fine, that’ll do
Dine dine etc
Colonel Saunders frying feathers, makin’ glue.
Dine dine dine etc
Keep it fine, with lots of wine and lots of lovin’, too.
Make it steamy, sour creamy, all that lovin’ too.
Parsley Sage Rosemary and …
Time pissed on paradise, there’s now a parking lot.
Your cheatin’ heart will tell on …
You get all you can from an American stew.
A 2
Boogie Uncle woogie Sam,  people he wants you.
Dine dine dine etc
Boogie, funk ‘n’ jazzy jam,  voodoo rhythm too.
Dine dine dine etc
Keep on truckin’, mother fuNkin’,  smiley faces zoo.
Dine dine dine etc
Always junkin’, legal skunkin’,  mental cases too.
Dine dine dine tc

B .
C .
A 3
Flying mumbo, Southern Gumbo, something in the air.
One polenta two polenta, European faire.
One ring circus, two ring circus, turning on a dime,
baby jumbo, Disney Dumbo, once upon a time.


My Kind o’ Livin’
Written for Little Paul Venturi

Here, I sit alone,
a-cradling me.
I’m gonna sleep all day,

Here, I sleep alone,
don’t think about me,
know what I think of you?
Nothing at all.

(She said,)
“Your kind ‘o livin’
Oh, would drive me crazy”
Your kind o’ livin’
Will leave you alone  / Will leave me alone   / Will drive them away.”

My kind o’ livin’.
It’s mine.
It’s my kind o’ livin’.

I’m just,  a man alone
a wonderin’ why.
When I took this road
it wasn’t dry.

Oh. You find yourself
just once in your life.
Yeah, and you find yourself
nothing but alone.

all (c) Christopher Dean Andrews 2020